Meeting Request
by When In Doubt Smile
Summary: Nick Fury shocks the Avengers with how well he knows them an their slightly childish qualities.


**Disclaimer- Everything you recognize is property of Marvel.**

* * *

Meeting Requests

Without a shadow of a doubt, Steve is the Avenger that Nick Fury is most willing to listen to. After all, Fury rationalizes, they did take the man out of his time, away from everything that he knew then plopped him in the middle of New York City. Also, Rogers was the only individual who could be counted on to be polite consistently. So when Rogers walks into Fury's office asking for a meeting, the director gladly obliges.

Steve bumbles on about the weather and how great things are at SHIELD and how grateful he is to have such great friends in his teammates, even if Tony can be a little obnoxious sometimes. He's been talking for 16 minutes when Fury says, "Rogers, is there a point to his meeting or would this be better classified as a lunch date?"

Steve practically falls over himself trying to apologize to Fury, causing the director so simple bury his head in his hands. _They really are a bunch of children, aren't they?_ Nick thinks. Finally, he stands up and looks at Rogers, "No, Steve. SHIELD cannot force Tony Stark to take lessons in etiquette."

Steve Rogers is left standing alone in Fury's office, his mouth dangling open as he tries to figure out just how Nick Fury knew exactly what he was going to ask for without him saying it.

* * *

When Tony Stark walks into Nick Fury's office without knocking, he man takes two more painkiller pills for his already-painful headache because he knows it is about to get much worse. Stark walks right in and makes himself at home, sitting on the edge of Fury's desk, touching his books, messing with the guns mounted on his walls. "Stark," Tony nods to Fury to indicate that he is listening. "You have exactly two minutes. Start talking."

Stark doesn't take it the way he is supposed to, or maybe he does; Fury can't tell what with all the scientific words the billionaire is using. His head feeling like it is ready to burst, Fury stands, grabs Stark by the shoulders and turns Tony so that he is facing him, and states in his dangerously calm tone used only to intimidate the Avengers, "I am not paying for the damages to your suit caused by your own partying." The door slams as Fury leaves.

Tony doesn't quite know to say, what with the fact that Nick Fury knew exactly what he was going to say, even though he had used as many decasyllabic words as possible.

* * *

Bruce rarely asks for anything, so Fury is surprised when the man requests a meeting. Bruce walks in, as calm as can be, playing with a string that he is hypnotically wrapping around his finger, then unwinding. Fury is pretending to not have noticed the man enter the room, instead focusing on the report from Hill that he really should have read yesterday. Banner takes the seat on the other side of Nick's desk and clears his throat, "Interesting report?"

"Mildly," Fury responds.

"Anything we're needed for?"

"The Avengers? No, you all need a break after that thing in Nashville. So, what do you need, Banner?"

Next thing Fury knows, he is listening to what must a whole semester's worth of information on gamma radiation and its affects on the brain. After about 20 minutes of this, Fury picks up his report once again and from the behind the paper says, "Banner, I am not buying you a lab full of microwaves. I don't care how useful they are."

Bruce leaves not quite sure how Fury knew what he wanted even though he knew he hadn't said it.

* * *

Thor strides in, hammer at his hip, full armor on, and a big grin on his face. Fury doesn't quite remember him requesting a meeting, but since when have the Avengers been slowed down by whether or not they have requested a meeting? Fury is braced for a full-fledged argument with the Norse god of thunder, when Thor comes before his desk, hands clasped behind is back, an eager look on his face. "Yes, Thor?" Fury asks.

Thor launches into a litany of retellings of Norse myths, revealing that is actually nervous about asking Nick Fury for something. Fury sits through the first four, all the while secretly reading news articles about an averted disaster in Munich. He understands that sometimes it is best to simply let Thor talk until he gets around to saying whatever it is that he wants to tell you, but Fury has a 4:00 meeting that he really can't be late to, so he stops Thor and says, "No, you cannot Agent Hill to buy you more Pop-Tarts. Try asking Tony."

Thor isn't quite sure just how Nick Fury knew exactly what he was going to ask.

* * *

Fury is used to Clint Barton barging into his office at the oddest points in time, but never has he known the man to come at 2:00 AM, dressed in head-to-toe black, and carrying a pillow. Fury takes one look at Agent Barton before he puts his head down on his desk and tells the man, "No, you most certainly cannot sleep in the air vents!"

Clint didn't know Fury was that intuitive.

* * *

Fury thinks Natasha should have known better than to come into his office right he has had to deal with Tony Stark for eight hours. His brain is fried and his patience was non-existent 7 hours and 59 minutes ago. "Make it fast, Agent Romanoff."

Fury's positive that she is purposely speaking to him in Russian. When he begins to tell her that he can't understand her, she switches to Mandarin. Then French. Then German. Then Spanish. Then Greek. Then back to Russian. Fury finally loses it with the redhead and shouts, "No, you cannot tie up your fellow Avengers just because they touched one of your guns."

Natasha starts to wonder if maybe Fury secretly speaks Russian after all.

* * *

"No, you cannot re-name the Avengers Initiative. I don't care how boring the name is."

* * *

"No, Agent Hill is not a suitable replacement for Agent Romanoff."

* * *

"No, you cannot hold a SHIELD Christmas party."

* * *

"No, Agent Barton's arrows are not waterproof and is you try to prove me wrong you will no longer have a job!"

* * *

"No, you cannot host a Star Wars marathon here for all your billionaire friends."

* * *

"No, you are not allowed to bribe any SHIELD personnel with shwarma."

* * *

"No, Thor is not allowed to flood someone's house just because they annoyed you. Or cause it to be struck by lightening."

* * *

"No, I do not want a shirt that says Number One fan of Fury's Super-Secret Boy-Band."

* * *

"No, you cannot create a super-secret boy-band, we've already been over this."

* * *

"No, you cannot kick the next person who touches you beakers out of the Avenger's tower.'

* * *

"No, prank wars are not allowed at SHIELD. Nor do they count as acceptable extra-curricular activities."

* * *

After a while, all six Avengers are left speechless at Nick Fury's apparent gift to be able to know exactly what they want before they even open their mouths. "I didn't even walk in the room and he knew!" Tony moans one day to his teammates.

Natasha tries to help them all feel better by reminding them, "Well, Fury is psychic. Guess it comes with the territory. Babysit enough Avengers and you get to the point where you can read their minds."

* * *

Author's Note- Happy Halloween to everyone! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed and that you will review!

Be awesome today,

-When In Doubt, Smile


End file.
